Roomies
by Kalaia
Summary: A story about the crazy life of Alex and her roommate Gabriel. Alex is the personification of Karma. Gabriel is Gabriel. Chapters are not necessarily in chronological order. Basically just me daydreaming about what it'd be like to have Gabriel as a roommate.
1. Roomies by Chance, yeah right

"That was my favorite bag, you bitch! Get out! OUT!"

The door to my apartment flew open. I stumbled out into the hallway as my lovely roommate (Bri) pushed me. I barely had time to process what had just happened before my suitcase was thrown out afterward. I quickly rolled out of the way, narrowly avoiding getting concussion via TUMI. Sammy, my terrier, barked and ran out before the door slammed shut.

A few weeks ago, me being the amazing procrastinator I am, realized that I should probably secure an apartment before grad school started again. I had deemed my previous apartment unlivable, due to an unfortunate problem of absolutely no working heat. I had stuck it out the first year with a mound of blankets and a space heater I had affectionately named Thomas. After a winter of icicles appearing on the inside of my window, I decided it was time to find a new apartment. Thomas was still with me, currently sitting in my car. I loved that hard-working little appliance. Anyway, I found an ad on craigslist (really the only way to find affordable housing) that promised working heat, an amiable roommate to lower prices, and the amazing perk of the laundry machine being located inside the apartment. I called, Bri agreed to sublease, and everything was copacetic. Until twenty minutes after moving in, when my dog decided to pee on her purse. It was an ugly purse.

Now, I was apartment-less. It was basically guaranteed that the only building with any openings left near campus was my old one. I just sat there for a while, quietly contemplating the best way to live unnoticed in the campus buildings. I could shower in the gym… Bark! I looked down at Sammy, noticing for the first time that a red lacy bra hung from the dog's mouth, saliva dripping into the left cup.

"Your dog has good taste," an amused voice observed.

I looked up. A guy in his, mid-thirties?, blonde hair, ridiculous golden eyes, and bright red boxers (props for him being so confidant), leaned against a wall a few doors down from me.

I wrinkled my nose. "Not really. They're super uncomfortable."

He snorted. "I don't think that's the point."

I hmm'd. The humanities building would be best for sleeping. Lots of places to hide and great heating.

"What's his name?"

Blondie was now kneeling on the ground, scratching Sammy's ears. He wagged his tail in approval.

"Sammy."

"Great name." Amusement sparked in his eyes, accompanying a wide grin. I sensed an inside joke.

"I think so. He seems to like it so far."

The man chuckled and he tilted his head, studying me.

"What's your name?"

"Alex," I lied.

"Well, Alex. I couldn't help but overhear your little tif. What happened? Lover's quarrel?"

He wiggled his eyebrows.

I couldn't help but laugh. "No. This was my first time meeting her in person. I was moving in today. Guess not anymore though."

Blonde dude's face scrunched up. "What in the Sam hill did you do to get kicked out on the first day?"

"Sammy peed on her bag." I shrugged, in the 'what can you do' kind of way.

His eyes widened. "You're kidding." He guffawed and gave Sammy an enthusiastic head rub. "Well you know what they say. Dogs are great judges of character." He let the dog play chew on his hand for a few seconds, then his eyes shot back to me, a sly grin on his face. "You know, it just so happens I'm looking for a roommate myself."

I raised my eyebrows. "Are you serious? That's kind of a big coincidence."

He shrugged. "Call it divine intervention."

"You'd really let me move in with you?"

"Why not? I like your dog, and you seem tolerable." He ignored my glare and continued. "Match made in heaven."

"But you don't even know me. I could be a serial killer!"

"Good thing I don't like cereal then."

I stared at him. "I don't know if that was lame or really clever."

He grinned. "Anyway, shouldn't you be assuming I'm the murderer? Mysterious, but incredibly attractive, stranger offers a bed to an innocent, slightly less attractive, young ingenue?"

"Ok, one: I'm not sleeping in your bed."

He pouted.

"And two: rude. I am way more attractive than you."

The amused grin was back. He quirked one eyebrow in challenge.

"Three: I can handle myself."

"Huh." He looked thoughtful.

"What?"

"Really thought number three was going to be, 'I'm not that innocent.'"

I groaned. "Britney Spears. Really?"

"So what do you say then, Luna? Deal?" He held out his hand.

I shook my head. "No."

"What?" Genuine surprise, slight disappointment.

"I need to know your name first."

He relaxed and smiled. "They call me Gabriel."

I reached out and grabbed his hand to shake. "It's a deal, Gabe."

His apartment was….interesting, to say the least. It was a similar size to Bri's, probably a little bigger. The decor, on the other hand…

"The landlord really let you go to town."

He grinned. "Like it?"

I shook my head in disbelief.

The kitchen was the same as Bri's, give or take a few beer bottles. The living room looked like a 70's disco had thrown up on it. The floor was black and white tile, bar and wallpaper matched. On the wall, large posters of beautiful women in sexy poses were artfully framed. A large red armchair sat facing the largest poster, below which plush black leather furniture sat. Sammy quickly ran over and leapt onto the couch, making a few circles of sniffs before plopping down with a snort. A small end table had a few copies of World Weekly News on it. And next to the red chair…

"Is that a champagne holder?"

Gabriel had sat down. He leaned back, crossing his arms behind his head.

"Great, isn't it?"

I snorted and walked over to where Sammy was laying. I experimentally sat back. Good lord almighty, his furniture was comfy. I sunk back further and closed my eyes, groaning. My eyes popped back open when I heard Gabe's snicker.

"What is this made out of?" I asked. "My last hotel bed wasn't even this comfortable."

"Leather," he responded. "And love. Lots of love if you know what I mean." He winked.

I made a disgusted face, but didn't move. "Ugh. Remind me to shower in Purell later."

"Will do, Lexi."

I raised my head. "Lexi?"

He shrugged and stood up. "Ready for the tour?"

I held up my hand. "You're gonna have to pull."

The tour lasted about two minutes. The kitchen/living area had a small hall leading off of it, two bedrooms were across from each other, a bathroom next to his, and a closet at the very end of the hall. The bathroom continued the living room's black and white theme. It was clean, though. I did my best to ignore the playboys in the basket below the sink.

My room was average sized. It was much more to my taste than the living room. It had a large window at the end. The color was a soft yellow and it had a warm glow from the sunlight coming in. It was already furnished with a bed, which was a plus. Queen sized, a bit bigger than I was used to. I sat on it; just as comfy as the couch. There was a dresser and a desk. To my surprise and delight, a bookshelf was built into the wall. All in all, way better than expected. I finished my inspection and looked up at Gabriel who was also examining the room.

"I think I'm going to like it here."

He grinned.


	2. Selfie!

"Gabriel?"

"Yes, darling?"

"Don't call me darling." I stared at the living room wall. Gabriel was in the bathroom, primping or something.

"Yes, pumpkin?"

I rolled my eyes. "Have you noticed something wrong with your posters?"

Gabriel exited the bathroom, wiping off excess shaving cream from his face with a wash towel. He stopped next to me, propping his elbow on my head. He studied the posters for a moment, lips pursed.

"Nope." He popped the p.

"So nothing about these screams 'wrong'."

He shook his head. "Looks the same to me."

"Gabriel," I started with dangerous calm. "WHY ARE THESE ALL POSTERS OF ME!?"

Indeed each and every poster Gabriel owned, now had my face on it. The backgrounds were the same. The poses were the same. The clothes were the same. Except the person was now me. I'd never made some of those faces in my life.

Gabriel backed a little away from me. His eyes were alight with the typical amusement, glee, and deviousness that came with his pranks. However, this time a tiny flicker of fear sparked behind it all.

"I thought it was an improvement!"

I slapped my hands to my face to cover the cherry red stain spreading across my cheeks.

Gabriel's grin grew smugger, if that was possible.

I glared. "These better be fixed by the time I get out of the shower!"

I stomped off to the bathroom, feeling slightly better after hearing the sound of fingers being snapped. The shower did wonders to calm me down. I entered the living room afterwards, towel drying my hair. I saw the posters and shrieked. I quickly covered my eyes.

"GABRIEL!"

There was no answer. I uncovered my eyes, avoiding looking at the posters. I noticed a sticky note on the table.

'Enjoy' was all it said.

I crumpled up the piece of paper and threw it at one of the posters. The posters which now, instead of carrying my image, now featured Gabriel.


End file.
